nursery rhymes!!

nothing particularly interesting happened at the pharmacy today.. except in the morning when this little boy was staring at me vacuuming.. aww.. with his little coat on just standing in amazement with his mouth open.. hahaha just looking at me vacuuming.. his little eyes following me around.. GAHH I WANT KIDS!! hahah but cute ones. but not now. YEAH NOW. no not now. ok not now. just wait nick. your turn will come. anyway.. today seeing so many little kids today, id like to blog about nursery rhymes. and how evil they are. i guess we dont realise it when we tell OUR CHILDREN these nursery rhymes, but in fact they are EVIL MASTERPIECES OF DECEPTION. actually.. its not even that hard to tell if you just say them and THINK About what it is your saying to your little KIDS. ladies and gentlemen, i present to you Exhibit A : Rock-a-bye Baby. Rock a bye baby, in the treetop When the wind blows, the cradle will rock When the bough breaks the cradle will fall And down will come baby, cradle and all Now ladies and gentelmen. I put it to you that this NURSERY RHYME, told to INFANTS, is a cruel and evil piece of writing, possibly written by a satan worshipping druid who wanted to take over the world, beginning by killing all the babies. it tells of a baby.. ok fair enough. but IN A TREE TOP? imagine that. a parent putting their child in a cradle, in a TREE. and then the wind blows. and the cradle rocks. okay. AND THEN THE BRANCH BREAKS. OMG. and then the cradle FALLS?! WHAT ABOUT THE BABY? all is revealed in the final line of this twisted rhyme. THE BABY WILL OBVIOUSLY DIE. and so, as our kids are growing up, sleeping in their cots, we sing to them songs about them. in treetops. falling to the ground and dying. FANTASTIC.

and now, Exhibit B: Ring a ring a rosie

Ring a ring a rosie
A pocket full of posy
A tishoo A tishoo
We all fall down

Do we all KNOW what this is about? it originates from the days of the great plague in europe. where MILLIONS DIED. ring a ring a rosie.. forgot where that came from. lol. A POCKET FULL OF POSY. means a pocket full of herbs.. which were supposed to keep the plague away. a tishoo a tishoo. SNEEZING which equals DYING. WE ALL FALL DOWN = WE ALL DIE.

SO YOU SEE GOOD LADIES AND GENTLEMEN. NURSERY RHYMES ARE EVIL AND MACABRE PIECES OF WRITING. they are the spawn of the devil and must be exorcised from our society. may god have mercy on the souls of our children, and indeed, us all.

and something else.. nursery rhymes can be bloody random too.. which is what i love lol

Exhibit C : HEY DIDDLE DIDDLE

Hey diddle diddle
The cat and the fiddle
The cow jumped over the moon
The little dog laughed to see such fun
And the dish ran away with the spoon

Need i freakin say more? just read each line slowly and THINK about it. how are all these things related? THEYRE NOT. actually, diddle was how little kids said *dick* back in nz HAHAH.. how is that to do with cows over the moon.. dogs laughing.. and dishes running away with SPOONS? i bet this was written by a hippie that had a little too many MAGIC MUSHROOMS... ya know what im sayin? BAHAHA.. like that time homer had a hot chilli and dreamt about the dog and shit..

AND NICK RAN AWAY WITH THE DISH AND SPOON =]

BYE!! *skips off merrily singing with the dish and spoon*